To everyone who is going to read this, I have one request for you. - Please don't think of any human being to be small, if you can love an animal irrespective of its size and its uniqueness, why treat humans differently? A person can’t help their body deformities, it is God-Given. Please don't think of them to be anything else, love them and accept them like you would a normal person. I am normal just like you - I can do everything you can do, despite the physical difficulty! Sometimes I can do things a normal person may not be able to do!
I am a businessman, I have been for 12 years and every day I meet my team, they know me and appreciate me. The lesson to be learned is every difficulty can be overcome. Life moves in only two phases - the good days and the bad days, and these are constantly changing! Never be disheartened and sad, be happy you and be happy and enjoy your life!
Lastly, keep praying for Susmita and me to live a good long life with lots of happiness to be able to set an example that love defeats all odds!
It all started in 2014 when Susmita sent me a friend request and I just accepted it as one would, without knowing what it would lead to. A few days later I put a picture, and she commented on it, which I liked so I praised it saying “yeh comment ache hai”. That is how we started talking on Facebook messenger, little by little. One thing led to another and we exchanged numbers. We shifted platforms, but our conversations were endless.
I finally asked her one day, “Can we meet?” and to my joy, she agreed!
We met up at a coffee shop, just talked like friends, and did “idhar udhar ki baate”. I had always felt like she was a strong woman, and as we spent more time together, we got to understand each other clearly.
Susmita had an operation, and she had to leave Kolkata to go back home. When she told me this news, my mood shifted instantly, it did not feel right, I felt like I was not okay. She sensed that I had feelings for her, but I was scared to tell her. So Susmita took matters in her own hands, she confessed to me she had feelings for me! I was overjoyed, and I told her, "I have feelings for you too, but it is not easy to live with me, to lead life with me because nobody will see it as being right, you might be thought of as a gold-digger. In general there will be negativity and I want you to know that, so if you can fight that, we could happen.” I said that and left, and she left to go home.
I phoned her afterward, to know her answer, she said to me “Give me some time to think about it!” ................. Soon after, she said yes!
This is how our journey started. We both mutually agreed that we would only marry once we convince our parents, otherwise we won’t. She was hesitant at first, she thought her father would not agree, stating that where she came from her family, her relatives might not understand.
I knew from my side of the family there would not be any issues, so between the two of us, she is the one who has had to face problems head-on, and she has done so beautifully!
Susmita started convincing her father slowly and steadily, by showing him every time I was on TV, at an award function, or in a program. This is how I was introduced to her family. After 6 years of persuasion, I told my parents that its time and she said the same to hers.
Susmita’s parents only said one thing, “ It is your decision, we don’t want any heartache from either side, so if you feel it is right for you and you can be happy with him, then do it. But, don’t make him unhappy, it is your decision, think and take your stand.”
This was however not the only final or tough decision in our life together, there were innumerable problems we had to face in those 7 years too!
One of our biggest challenges was 'human reactions', in the beginning when people used to see us together, such as when we would go to the mall were uncomfortable at, for Susmita, so much so that she used to get angry! I had been used to the stares since I was a child. I remember random people coming up to whoever was with me like my mom and ask her my age, and whether I was born like this.
This was all new for Susmita, so I had to tell her, “There is no reason to be angry, we live in India, anyone who is too tall, too short, too fat or too thin was amusing. We shouldn’t care, the more we think about it the bigger the problem will become!"
The other biggest issue we have to constantly deal with is 'unnecessary attention around me. In the early days of our companionship, I used to wonder how Susmita would adjust to the environment. In fact, it is something that we have to deal with even now!
Recently, we had gone for a photo shoot, there were two ladies sitting there and I went and sat near them. One of the ladies left as soon as I sat there, so I told her, “Oh please, you don’t have to move I am just sitting here because I am tired, I don’t mean to cause any trouble!” What she said to me was, “No, sitting around you, will take away my dignity.” She said this to my face and left!
This is the truth of the world we will live in. It hurts to hear things like these, and it hurts more than Susmita has to hear these things too! It is difficult sometimes for me to handle, but Susmita is so strong!
Susmita is a fashion designer from NIFT, she works with Sabyasachi, she is independent and she has been living by herself since Grade 11. Aside from the work outside of the home, she cooks great food too, out of interest and hobby for cooking. She feeds me such yummy food, we enjoy it together! All in all, she is a self-sufficient woman and that is one of the parts I love about her!
If I had to sum up the thing I love most about Susmita, it is definitely her smile! She accepts matters graciously with a smile, and her smile attracts me the most.
I am lucky to meet such an amazing life-long partner. I know I can’t change the way I look and the way I am is god-gifted. Although I don’t regret it, it is not something that I can do anything about. So I am left with only a few options - either I can cry about it, or I can accept it and embrace it. I choose the second, I am what I am! This is my motto and I live by it. Susmita was accepted so well in my family, she is loved by everyone! All of her close relatives have accepted me too, and it has been a year since we have been married. I just hope to continue living this happy life - we work, we are happy, we travel and there is nothing we can’t do. How a year has gone by and we didn’t even realize, I am glad we’re doing good and hopefully, it continues this way forward too!